This is very important. I'm a 27 year old girl. I live in Nigeria now however, I grew up in England (I left Nigeria at about 16). At 22, after my masters, my dad demanded I move back to Nigeria in hopes that I'd find a good NIGERIAN man to marry rather than my then boy friend (he was white so my after believed if I married him it won't last). Sadly, I listened and broke up with my boyfriend, Harry -he was the best man I had ever been with, he was amazing, caring and most importantly he put me before himself in any situation- and within a week I was back here in Nigeria, a country I hadn't seen in so long. My mum followed me to help me settle in. I was back to Nigeria in search of a husband.
I had stayed in Nigeria for two years already when I met Abdul. Everything was alright. He was kind as well, very caring and almost anything any girl could wish for. We talked about marriage and about a year later, we got married. At this point I was 25. We gave ourselves a couple of months before we started trying for kids and soon after, we got pregnant and we had our beautiful daughter (I'd rather not mention her name).
Emeh, the problem now is it's been 4 months since my baby girl has been born and every single day Of this four months, Abdul has asked me whether my daughter and I are ready for our baby's circumcision. He has threatened to take her from me one day and go and circumcise her at his grandmothers place. He has also threatened To divorce me if i don't circumcise our daughter already.
Emeh I'm absolutely tired of this. I don't know if I should just take my daughter and run away. I really don't want my daughter to go through such pain and agony in life. How can you want to circumcise a female child in 2014 ? Please I really don't understand.
Please advice me. Put this in your blog and let your readers tell me what to do please Emeh. I beg you.
Thank you very much.
nawa ooo...you better take your baby girl and run back to England!!! don't let her get circumcised.
ReplyDeleteFemale circumcision? In this time and age? You did not mention yiur husbands background or learned level. Any man that supports female circumcision is a crude, ethnic-doctrinated individual. A relic of medieval zygotes. From your husband , worse things are lurking in the coming times. I am certain that he is from one of thise cultures where women are required to drink the dirty water accumulated from bathing theeir dead husbands to prove their innocence or are required to marry their dead husband's brother or are required to shave their hair.
DeleteI dont support divorce, unless threat to life exist. Have a discussion with your husband and his dad (his mum will mostly likely support his point of view). Involve your family.
If they dont see reason, take some time out, leave (separate not divorce). This is to enable your husband mature and hopefully gain some sense.
Report him to an NGO in charge of such things. Let them talk to him. That circumcision is painful oh
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ReplyDeleteSister, please follow M's advice. If that does not work, if you can take your daughter and run, please do so. Divorce is not a threat from that kind of person, I'd be happy if we got a divorce, to be honest.
ReplyDeletehaba u shuld report him to any force
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@poster pls see this http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=502jCYgu3nM&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D502jCYgu3nM pls jes run away with ur baby if ur husband is nt ready to listen to u....some females av menstral prblm, infertility n some evn die in d process been circumcised. Pls jes make a wise decision, dnt tell ur baby get circumcised.
ReplyDeleteCircumcision bawo.....sometimes I wonder y women don't knw the kind of man dey get married to...@ dis sophisticated modern age of ours one stupid man wud want to circumcise his own daughter for wat stupid reason!!!!
ReplyDeleteCarry your baby and run away please. Don't wait till he does it behind your back and subject that baby to pain.
ReplyDeleteThat is just WRONG! I'm praying for you and your daughter.
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Circumcise kwaaa ?? Ask Linda ikeji, she was circumcised !!
ReplyDeleteDear poster. Female genital mutilation is actually against the law in Nigeria. The problem is with the enforcement. Even though I believe marriage is forever, I think u shd take ur baby and run back to England. Don't tell him, don't say anything. Just start processing ur baby's passport as I guess by now u shd have secured ur British passport and carry ur pipkin go. Because one day, even of na market u go his people will come, carry ur baby and give her the cut. Or worse still, hold u down and do to in front of u. What will u do then? Even if u go to the NGOs, all they can do is talk. It might not change his mind. Just leave for a while, let him find another wife, marry, born girl, circumcise if he wants but not ur own sha. Good luck oh.
ReplyDeleteMy dear circumcision is a crime againt womanhood. If you ask me, I think you should divorce that moron of a husband you have. But at the same time, he will try to take your daughter away from you in the process. So the only option is for you to run away with your daughter. Get a job, and take good care of your child and move on. If not, I don't think you will be able to look her in the face some day and tell her that you could not protect her from such an act. You can do better without him. There is no marriage in the grave.
ReplyDeleteYou are young, educated and kinki. There are real men out who will kill to have you as a wife. Leave him, divorce/separation is no crime. Friends come and go, HUSBANDS come and go, but children don't, they stay.
ReplyDeletePray to God about it, its just a phase
ReplyDeleteTiwa savage expecting. a child
Jah is ur strength, don't divorce him oo
ReplyDeleteKim k flaunts her curves in a fishnet dress
Run away
ReplyDeleteI was circumcised and i know what that has done to my life.Its the worst thing a woman can go through.Just leave with your child because looks like your hubby is a control freak
ReplyDeleteSeconded!
DeleteEverything was removed from me, just the functional hole for urinating and procreating, that when I was having my baby, the doctor was angry with my parents!
I don't have any sexual feelings.
Poster, PLEASE LEAVE WITH YOUR CHILD TO ENGLAND!
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ReplyDeleteWell done DJ stelch, you have small sense in your coconut brain .I advice her to take her kid and leave, but she should be careful, nor then men can get wild and we know what that means. She should implore caution
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ReplyDeleteLETS GET SOME EDUCATION ON THIS ISSUE.
ReplyDeleteFemale Genital Mutilation (FGM) is a destructive, invasive procedure that is usually performed on girls before puberty. Part or all of the clitoris is surgically removed. This leaves them with reduced or no sexual feeling.
1. Sunna circumcision in which the tip of the clitoris and/or its covering (prepuce) are removed.
2. Clitoridectomy where the entire clitoris, the prepuce and adjacent labia are removed.
3. Infibulation (a.k.a. Pharaonic circumcision) which is a clitoridectomy followed by sewing up of the vulva. A small opening is left to allow urine and menstrual blood to pass.
4. A second operation is done later in life to reverse some of the damage. In some cultures, the woman is cut open by her husband on their wedding night with a double edged dagger. She may be sewn up again if her husband leaves on a long trip. (GUSH)
Side effects of the operation can include: shock, painful scars, keloid formation, labial adherences, clitoral cysts, chronic urinary infection, and chronic pelvic infections. Later in life, it can cause kidney stones, sterility, sexual dysfunction, depression, and various gynecological and obstetric problems. over 50% of the girls in Benin, Burkina Faso, Central African Republic, Chad, Côte d'Ivoire, Egypt, Gambia, Guinea, Guinea Bissau, Kenya, Liberia, Mali, Nigeria and Togo have been operated on. 90% or more of the girls in Ethiopia, Sierra Leone, Somalia, and Sudan (North) have been mutilated.
The justification for the operation appears to be largely grounded in a desire to terminate or reduce feelings of sexual arousal in women so that they will be much less likely to engage in pre-marital intercourse or adultery. The clitoris holds a massive number of nerve endings, and generates feelings of sexual arousal when stimulated..
MY OPENION: I see no benifit whatsoever, i think its life dangering for females which poses infection, risk in birthing and death. (NOW I KNOW THE REASON WHY TRUTH ALLWAYS MOPE @ ME WHILE I SWET MY LIFE AWAY) Madam the Decision Is Yours its either your WAKA OR STAY.. Thanks!!
Clitoridectomy , was what my parents did to me, and some part of me is still angry with them.
DeleteIn this time and age, please run away with your daughter.
IF,you decide to go ahead ignoring all the advice,PLEASE do it in a good hospital and not locally! Because, some of these locals are not clean spiritually. Your daughter MIGHT be initiated into the spiritual realm and have a spiritual husband, that she would be enjoying sex in the dream but not physically.
The bible ONLY circumcise males for covenant reason and we know the devil is a copy-cat, so circumcision of females is a covenant with the power of darkness.
I KNOW what am talking about, please nobody should cuss me out.
Save your daughter.
KAII!! Thank you for the info DJ. 50% of Nigeria n women? Chei. Poster please protect your daughter. In spite of all the awareness someone still wants to do this in 2014? Tomorrow who knows which one he'd come up with next?
DeletePLEASE TAKE YOUR TIME TO READ MY SHORT TESTIMONY WHICH MIGHT BE USEFUL TO YOU OR A PERSON NEAR TO YOU.
DeleteHello
My name is Mrs Vera. i want to share this short testimony with the good people of this world. It might be useful to you in one way or the other. This is my story.
My husband think polygamy is not wrong, he has been seeing another girl for the past 1 year now, and i told him he need to stop but he is saying he is in love with her, they have even talked about been together "FOREVER" and also
her moving in with us. my husband still loves me, he regret getting into this at the first place, but not willing to break-up with her, he says if he so break-up, there will be no other relationship outside their matrimony. Then i explain and complain to my VERY GOOD FRIEND called MERCY, and she contacted me with one spell caster called DR OKOSU.this great man told me that my husband was under the lady's spell. But he was able to break the spell and my husband ended the relationship with the lady within 48 hours and he came back to me apologizing for all the thing he did and begged for my forgiveness. I pray that ALMIGHTY GOD will continue to use you to help other people.Friends don't remain in silence because they say "A PROBLEM SHARED IS A PROBLEM HALF SOLVED" But i say a problem shared with this Great man is "A PROBLEM PERMANENTLY SOLVED" because someone like DR OKOSU has a solution to all your problems, no matter the problem just contact him on his Email:drokosu01@gmail.com I am living happily now with my husband and my 2 wonderful kids.DR OKOSU told me i could also contact him on any of the following problems:
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Hian?!. Carry ur baby run oooo. Infact report him to all these female right organistion!
ReplyDeletePLEASE TAKE YOUR TIME TO READ MY SHORT TESTIMONY WHICH MIGHT BE USEFUL TO YOU OR A PERSON NEAR TO YOU.
ReplyDeleteHello
My name is Mrs Vera. i want to share this short testimony with the good people of this world. It might be useful to you in one way or the other. This is my story.
My husband think polygamy is not wrong, he has been seeing another girl for the past 1 year now, and i told him he need to stop but he is saying he is in love with her, they have even talked about been together "FOREVER" and also
her moving in with us. my husband still loves me, he regret getting into this at the first place, but not willing to break-up with her, he says if he so break-up, there will be no other relationship outside their matrimony. Then i explain and complain to my VERY GOOD FRIEND called MERCY, and she contacted me with one spell caster called DR OKOSU.this great man told me that my husband was under the lady's spell. But he was able to break the spell and my husband ended the relationship with the lady within 48 hours and he came back to me apologizing for all the thing he did and begged for my forgiveness. I pray that ALMIGHTY GOD will continue to use you to help other people.Friends don't remain in silence because they say "A PROBLEM SHARED IS A PROBLEM HALF SOLVED" But i say a problem shared with this Great man is "A PROBLEM PERMANENTLY SOLVED" because someone like DR OKOSU has a solution to all your problems, no matter the problem just contact him on his Email:drokosu01@gmail.com I am living happily now with my husband and my 2 wonderful kids.DR OKOSU told me i could also contact him on any of the following problems:
( 1) want your ex back .
(2) You always have nightmares.
(3) To be promoted in your office
(4) Want a child.
(5 ) Do you want to be rich.
(6 ) want to hold your husband / wife to be yours alone forever.
(7 ) need financial assistance.
8) Do you want to be in control of you marriage
9) Want you be attracted to people
10) Childlessness
11) NEED A HUSBAND / WIFE
12) Cure for any disease.
Contact DR OKOSU today and you will be glad you did. Email: drokosu01@gmail.com
THANKS FOR YOUR TIME....