Lol I just got this open letter to all female friends..hope you all laugh as the writer said that's the aim...BELOW
Am Not A Lesbian
Dear female friends, (cos I can no longer address you as girl friends) Due to the new law banning same-sex-relationships, please note that I shall no longer:
1. Address U as dearie, Boo, sweetie, babes,etc. These names may be misconstrued by some over-zealous law enforcement people. Henceforth I shall address you by names *Maureen, Mfon, Iquo, Oge, Nkechi, Faith, Sikiratu etc
*2. I shall no longer hug, blow kisses or hold hands with you. Only handshakes and eyebrow wiggles are allowed. I shall cease sending you smileys like *hearts, hugs, kisses*. Do not send them to me either or I shall delete U from my list to guarantee my continued freedom.
3. Dancing together at parties is now forbidden. If we see in a public place, don't wave excitedly at me. A queen Elizabeth sad wave will do. Anything beyond this, I ll ignore you.
4. If you must express your love for me, please add agape at the end. I am writing this cos I love U all AGAPELY and wouldn't want to end up in the women's section at Kirikiri.
5. It's dangerous for us to share bathrooms now. Please wait until am through or bath elsewhere. Girls night out and sleepovers are banned. Please stay in Ur house so we can have our liberty. If U must visit me, plz bring ur mattress and room dividers.
6. No more lifts. Endure the sun or buy your car. You understand, don't you? Fourteen years imprisonment is a long time and I am not MANDELA.
Your She Friend
Lmao!
ReplyDeleteHeHeHehehehe.....very funny!
DeleteNot funny
DeleteHaba boo have a sense of humor naw...
Delete?????? Yuck
ReplyDeleteWay to go now oo.............in the light of the anti-gay law that's wat it implies naa. lol
ReplyDeleteLol
ReplyDeleteThis is s disgrace to we the gay community. We shall find out who wrote this trash. The war against us is strong but we shall prevail. Ayeeeeeeee!
ReplyDeleteGay & happy please feel free to start a protest from your street & see if they won't burn you alive...Lmao
Deletelol
ReplyDeleteFor hot,juicy,gossip Please visit my blog samuelohis.blogspot.com
Lmao! I dey roll like tyre.. She killed it! Lmao.
ReplyDeleteLol, she nailed it
ReplyDeleteLMFAO!
ReplyDeleteVery funny!! She's not wrong oh!! And certainly NO MORE trying out clothes together in rooms oh, 14 years no b beans!!!!
ReplyDeleteLol, saw this on instagram
ReplyDeletelmao
ReplyDeleteTeacher caught in the act with student in school premises
Here
Teenager Caught Hving Sex In The Bush With A Married Man
Here
Lady Uses Fuel Pump To Satisfy Herself From orgasm
Here
Woman goes to a Public Funeral without Under Wear, see what happened Next…
Here
Not funny yish
ReplyDeleteI wrote this piece as a satire not a reason to declare any meaningless war. (this particular piece seems to have been lifted off Nairaland where it was posted without my consent and the poster changed a few words)
ReplyDeleteI'll post the male version next week. Anyone interested in reading more should click on http://rachaelzheart.wordpress.com/
Endtimes letter
ReplyDeleteLol
ReplyDeleteI was in the female section of Kirikiri for a while efcc and dem wahala.......... but It isn't that bad a place sha. Make una continue to de lick pussy. for the men that will continue, believe me, Ikoyi and Kirirkiri male prison will be a good place to get all the dicks you can bend for. After 14 yrs, If u come out with ya anus intact, You were seriously born gay.
ReplyDelete@galore d pussy licker!! Eeyya I sorry 4 u o!! Kai 14 years dey wait 4 u!!........OKIJA WIFE
ReplyDeleteSome of u guys don't have the courage to speak openly...so u use these blog comment sections to act like the real dogs that you are mtchewwwwww
ReplyDelete